how much is too much?

Its amazing how much we like pain. We deny it like everything else in this world.... like having a boyfriend or about not being in love or about loving the work we do. We all love pain. Sweet pain. We get pleasure out of bursting a pimple on the forehead or chin. Or the pain caused by scratching the scab off an old wound. But how does that work emotionally? Do we really know when to stop? When to quit thinking to such an extent that you wonder why you started thinking in the first place?How many times has it happened to you that you start off your day in a good note. Everything is hunky dory and then kaboom thunder and trouble in paradise. What happened there? Why the sudden mood swing? We can blame it on PMS ( Well don’t we all) and some blame it on lack of sleep the night before. But the fact is we got thinking. And one thing let to another and a chain reaction started. You know exactly what is bothering you but at the same time you don’t know how to solve it. You feel stupid thinking about it but you did and now there is no turning back. Its like a step you took and perhaps no one was watching... but you landed yourself in a trap. And now that you’ve landed there all you can do is panic. How much is too much? When do you know when to stop? Or Should one not think at all?

voices

Shut up!!! Shut up! Shut up!! I screamed.

You speak too much. How can you talk so much? Aren't you tired of listening to yourself all the freaking time. Are you not tired of talking? where do you get the energy to go on and on endlessly. Can you do without talking for just one moment. who listens to you? Why can't you just leave me alone.

suddenly all was quiet. I could hear myself breathe again. the silence was eery but I was liking it. The voices in my head silenced. I could function again. Work in this mechanical world.